Can't Even

Oof this is definitely the most relatable book I've read, ever. The fish & water quotation from David Foster Wallace really is adept here.

My main take away is the definition of burn out, which the book contrasts against exhaustion by defining exhaustion as when you can't surmount an obstacle vs burn out which is you keep trying harder. 

Other super familiar quotations:

I started by sorting through a vast array of articles, mostly written by millennials, and mostly published on millennial-oriented websites, on the everyday stresses of "adulting' -a word adopted to describe the fear of doing or pride in completing tasks associated with our parents. As one piece put it, "The modern Millennial, for the most part, views adulthood as a series of actions, as opposed to a state of being. Adulting therefore becomes a verb." And part of adulting is getting the things done on the bottom half of your to-do list, even if they're hard.

Millennials became the first generation to fully conceptualize themselves as walking college resumes. With assistance from our parents, society, and educators, we came to understand ourselves, consciously or not, as "human capital": subjects to be optimized for better performance in the economy. That pressure to achieve wouldn't have existed without the notion that college, no matter the cost, would provide a path to middle-class prosperity and stability. But as millions of overeducated, underemployed. and student-debt-laden millennials will tell you, just because everyone around you believes in the gospel doesn't mean it's necessarily true. College didn't alleviate the economic anxiety of our parents. It didn't even guarantee our position in the middle class, or, in many cases, actually prepare us for the job market. But the preparation for college taught us a valuable, lingering lesson: how to orient our entire lives around the idea that hard work brings success and fulfillment, no matter how many times we're confronted with proof to the contrary.

but now I feel like a good job is something that doesn't require me to work more than forty hours on a regular basis, and with duties that feel challenging and interesting while still doable. I don't want a "cool' job anymore, because I think jobs that are your 'dream' or your 'passion' consume too much of one's identity outside of work hours in a way that can be so toxic. And I don't want to lose my identity if I lose my job, you know?

Lastly but certainly not the least because I've repeated this sentiment sooo many times that it actually feels like my soul is hurting from reading it:

When I'm stressed by work, I find myself resenting the amount of sleep I need. Even though I know that sleep actually increases productivity, what I understand is that it decreases available working hours. […] Sometimes I read about physically and psychologically anomalous “short sleepers," like the dozens of CEOs who survive and thrive on just a few hours of sleep a day and feel deep pangs of jealousy.

Makes sense how I would purposely stay up when I feel stressed despite being fully aware I am doing something stupid.